Sick Or Treat?

If you strip away the candy-coated exterior, Halloween is essentially an incredibly efficient extortion racket.

Once a year millions of children dressed in an assortment of zany outfits descend on homes across America and demand candy, and if they don't get any there's an implicit threat to unleash an act of mischief on the non-payer.

And it works. Not only does it work, but people can't get enough of it. Adults rush out to fill bowls the size of Luxembourg with chocolate treats and positively will the hordes of scamps to knock on their door and clear them out of snacks. Kids get to wear costumes and have a great time, which in turn makes the adults even happier when they see the kids having a great time. It's a truly brilliant concept.

So brilliant, in fact, that I think it's time to extend this gem of an idea into new areas of life. If we can actually persuade people to give stuff away and make them feel good about doing it, then quite frankly we need to nurture this concept and make it work in other, exciting ways.

Take healthcare for example. I don't care if you're Democrat or Republican, there are very few people who'd deny that having millions of people without health insurance is a good thing for the country. But - as with most things in life - nobody wants to pay for it.

So today I'm unveiling my solution to America's healthcare woes - Sick Or Treat.

It goes something like this. The Federal government adds a new holiday to the calendar....let's call it Sick Or Treat Day for now. In order to celebrate Sick Or Treat Day, American children will be encouraged to dress-up in costumes - maybe as a surgeon, nurse, Avian Flu Virus or Dr. Dre - and then knock on every door in their community.

When somebody answers the door, the kid just needs to utter the words "Sick Or Treat" and demand $10 for the "Treat". Now, for Sick Or Treat Day we're aiming big. We're aiming to hit every house in the country - a number which runs into the millions.

If you multiply $10 by the total number of homes in America, you've got yourself a sizable chunk of change - and that cash would immediately be poured into a Government sponsored healthcare scheme.

It's like Halloween all over again, but with benefits. The kids have a great time, the adults have a great time and while everyone's so busy having a great time the USA is building a brand new universal healthcare system.

The answer to our healthcare problems doesn't rest with private insurance schemes or higher income taxes, but rather with the collective cuteness factor of our nation's youth. I'd much rather give a 4-year old dressed as Debbie The Doggie Dermatologist $20 then I would the IRS, or God forbid a politician.

So forget the boy scouts, forget the Peace Corps, and forget the after-school clubs. We need to harness the "awwwwww" factor of our kids to raise the funds we need to provide services and benefits for millions of Americans.

Clinton, Obama and Romney take note. This is a revolution waiting to happen - which one of you will be brave enough to light the spark?